WHEN I HAD AND WHEN I DIDNT

When I had,my house was always full,Any decision that was to be made depended on my say,in other words it’s me that ruled.

To everyone I was good even if I knew that my words sometimes came out as rude
Phone calls after phone calls,i was the DUDE indeed.

But it was different when I didnt have,
My house was empty.
I wasn’t included in any decision,infact I was the definition of invisible.
No one noticed when i was there not
I completely had no say.

When I had I was a good person,
I would take other’s problems and deal with the messers head on.
No one would see but I would get credit after all.

But it was different when I didnt have,
I would still get the blame for not defending even If i did,
“The bad person”was now me
Even though i tried to be the best version of me that i could ever be.

When I had I realised I had something to offer.
But it was different when I didnt have because I had nothing materialistic to help them go far.
When I had I was blind,
But it was different when I didnt but I just couldn’t give up being kind.

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